Comments on: The youngest was the most loved?

By: 2011 – A Review of The Year (part 1) « Knees Up Mother Brown

2011 – A Review of The Year (part 1) « Knees Up Mother Brown — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 15:22:17 +0000

[...] The youngest was the most loved [...]

By: Kate

Kate — Thu, 13 Jan 2011 20:31:47 +0000

a) possibly but I don’t think of my first that way.

b) nope, I don’t think so. My two are different and they are both special to me. I genuinely don’t have a favourite. They both have good and bad sides.

c) YES. Natural to worry about it but trust me, you will. Don’t worry about it, just go with the flow.

d) YES. Monkey was not quite 16 months old when Missy Woo was born. He just wanted to be like her. He climbed into her bouncy chair because he wanted to be like her, doing her things. He very quickly forgot that there was anything other than us 4 at home. From what I know, the critical age can be around the 18 month or older mark when they start to develop a sense of self.

It will be fine, trust me. You will probably appreciate the quiet times with the baby and I don’t think that Zara will feel “shipped out” at all, esp if she loves nursery. Not for now anyway.

It will be fine, and you’ll have enough love to go round. And you’ll cope. It’s natural to worry about them, but don’t let it spoil your pregnancy. Everyone worries but most fears turn out to be unfounded.

PS Monkey’s first word was “sister”…..

By: allybubba

allybubba — Thu, 13 Jan 2011 10:40:29 +0000

this is such an interesting post – I was thinking about it the other day when a friend had the same concern as you. She loves her son so much she was scared that she wouldnt love #2 nearly as much.
I let her know that I am the youngest of four and NEVER felt like I wasn’t loved as much as the rest. I actually felt more loved in a way, but then my siblings and I have spoken about this and in our own different ways we were made to feel special and loved by our parents.
I have no doubt you’ll love them equally – just make sure to give Zara some extra special cuddles and reassurance in the early days.

By: Rebecca Brown

Rebecca Brown — Thu, 13 Jan 2011 09:32:02 +0000

Hiya, good post!

My little boy was not quite 3 when our daughter was born and I had all the same questions. From my experience (but remember everyone is different!):
A&B) You answer yourself there! They’re both special but in different ways and there will be times when one is more special than the other but it will always swing the other way again. Certainly at first, in that newborn mode, you know Zara so much better while you’re getting to know number 2, but number 2 is so vulnerable and fragile…
C) it is more possible than you can imagine to fit all the love in your heart, although it does sometimes feel like it’s bursting out of you! You can & do love both children equally. Seems hard to believe and you won’t believe it until it happens.
D)she is really young, younger than mine was. I imagine the biggest challenge will be her not realising that you needing to carry the baby more doesn’t mean you want to cuddle Zara less, if you see what I mean. But I think she is prob too young for jealousy. In a couple of months she’ll struggle to remember life before baby 2. As will you!

Hope it helps, and good luck!
From another Mother Brown