dawniebrown

Well I’m almost 5 months in to life with a baby and toddler, and seeing as I’m a sharing kind of person I thought I’d share with you my top 10 tips on coping with two under 18 months!

1. Always have toddler’s favourite book or an iphone within reach when feeding baby. It is guaranteed the minute you settle down to feed the baby, the toddler will want to sit with you and have cuddles. I found the best way to cope with this is for the toddler to snuggle up next to you and you soon learn how to feed baby with one arm, cuddle toddler with the other and read a book with them or show them photos/videos/toddler apps on the iphone. It is either this or toddler will just throw themselves on the floor and have a screaming fit for the entire duration of baby’s bottle. (PS If toddler asks to see doggy videos, don’t type doggy into youtube and it is an idea to have a few “safe” videos that you have seen first to play them!)

You will soon learn to cuddle and feed/entertain both at the same time

2. Carrying a baby though a stairgate is a pain in the arse, it’s blinking awkward to manage a sleeping baby and open the gate without waking the baby but do not get in the habit of leaving the stairgates open because it is guaranteed that your toddler will discover that you’ve left it open before you do! Yes, trying to run and stop toddler descending the stairs by themselves, whilst carrying and trying not to wake the sleeping baby is pretty tricky!

3. Do not attempt to start potty training the toddler when you are home alone with a baby and a toddler. You will find that the minute toddler is naked and sitting on potty, the baby will decide that it needs your immediate attention. The very act of taking your eyes off the toddler for 10 seconds guarantees that toddler will then stand up, run around naked and do that long awaited for wee wee, but all over the carefully chosen potty training book you bought!

Do not attempt potty training unless there are 2 adults in the house

4. Always have a bowl of grapes handy! I have lost track of the number of times the bowl of grapes has been a lifesaver in this house. It has the ability to keep toddler distracted and happy for at least 15 minutes which is a bonus when baby has just thrown up all over you, itself, the cat and the sofa. 15 minutes gives you plenty of time to change your outfit, the baby’s outfit, clean the sofa, put a load of washing on and check the cat hasn’t legged it through an open window.

5. Give up on the idea of sleeping for quite a long time. When people tell you to sleep when baby sleeps resist the urge to tell them to get stuffed, just smile sweetly and nod in agreement. They probably don’t realise that your toddler doesn’t sleep at the same time as the baby and that the only time they are both asleep at the same time are between the hours of 7pm – 8.30pm, 1am-3am and 6-7am. You will soon find the ability to function on 3 hours sleep in a 24 hour period. If not breastfeeding I highly recommend stocking up on strong coffee or red bull! You will also find that the baby and toddler have an uncanny knack of tag-teaming each other throughout the night and when you finally get the baby settled, you will climb wearily into bed only for the toddler to wake up with teething pains. You will finally get the toddler settled again and it will be time for baby to wake up again. It gets better eventually – at almost 5 months I do get a decent sleep most nights nowadays (when I say decent I mean about 6 hours!)

6. If you bath the baby and toddler together, don’t (as my husband did!) suggest to the toddler that it would be funny to tip a bucket of water over the baby’s head. The toddler will finally demonstrate their ability to understand instructions and for once will do as they are told and yes they will find it hysterical. The baby however will not be impressed, that’s if they’ve managed to survive having half the bath emptied over their face!

7. Don’t be surprised if your toddler suddenly starts learning lots of new words. This week Zara has started saying the words “share” and “mine”. Share is used when grabbing Oscar’s toys off him when he is happily playing with them. Mine is used for snatching her own toys back off Oscar when he is happily playing with them. The use of either word usually results in tears from one of them.

MINE OKAR!

8. When the toddler is finally starting to take an interest and wanting to play with the baby, make sure you have the video camera ready because you are in for a lot of laughs. Though you will find many of your videos end up with the camera been thrown on the floor and the sounds of a panicking parent shouting “no no no noooo” – don’t believe me watch this (and note where Zara’s foot is heading)

9. Don’t ever tell the toddler off for showing an interest and wanting to play with the baby. Yes they will be a little rough, yes baby will get poked in the eye, sat on, have fingers shoved up it’s nose and in it’s eyes. But your toddler isn’t really intending to cause physical harm to the baby (I hope!) they are just showing a healthy interest and telling them off will achieve nothing (think water off a ducks back!). Just make sure you are always in a position to be able to step in before baby is dragged off the sofa or smothered by a cushion (I’m sure Zara was just wanting to play?)

10. Enjoy it! Trust me you will ask yourself a thousand times, who’s stupid idea was it to have two children so close together, you will cry with frustration, you will sometimes wonder how the hell you will cope and if you will ever sleep again. BUT you will also experience some of the cutest moments between them. When baby starts to laugh, your toddler will spend hours trying to make them laugh. When your toddler randomly just stops what they are doing and walks across and plants a kiss on baby for no apparent reason, your heart will melt and you will realise that as they grow up together it really could become something beautiful. (Either that or they will spend the next 18 years fighting like cat and dog – GOOD LUCK!)

It's all worth it for moments like this!